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Using Body Language to Show Character Emotions
People feel emotions constantly. That’s a fact. Whether they show their emotions, or how they show them, is unique to each individual. When we know someone well, we’re likely to know that, when they get a certain look in their eye, and there’s this little muscle twitching at the side of their clenched jaw, they’re probably mad about something and struggling not to voice it.
In a novel, our characters also feel emotions. The difference is, readers can’t see them, and, most likely, don’t start out the book knowing them very well. So how can an author show the reader what the character is feeling without simply naming emotions?
What is Body Language?
We’ve all heard the term “body language.” But what is it exactly? Body language can include gestures, facial expressions (even micro-expressions — those that come and go so fast they’re barely noticeable), posture and position of the body, even tone and volume of speech, among other things. This “language,” though silent, can communicate our feelings quite clearly.
We often aren’t aware of our body language. For example, we rarely think, “I’m going to raise my eyebrow and show him I’m not buying his excuses.” We just raise our eyebrow unconsciously. If the person the raised eyebrow is directed at is perceptive, he’ll likely understand we aren’t buying what he’s trying to sell us.
If we’re going to make our characters realistic, we have to consider their body language too. And really, not just consider it, but use it to help our readers get to know our characters better and to avoid overexplaining how our characters feel.
The Difference Between Naming Emotions and Showing Emotions
Fact is, telling us the character is angry isn’t the same as showing us the character is angry. We could talk about telling vs. showing ad nauseum, claiming that showing is always better than telling, but that’s just not the case. And when it comes to writing, it really can only be determined in the moment which is better.
It’s a fact…sometimes, telling is better than showing, but most often, particularly when it comes to emotions, simply naming the emotion isn’t nearly as powerful as showing the emotion through actions or body language, whether in person or on the page.
Think back on times you’ve been really mad a someone. How often do you outright name the emotion for them (as if they can’t see for themselves)?
For example, my first-person point of view character might say, “I’m so angry! Don’t you dare tell me I don’t care!” and we know they’re angry, but we can’t really feel it. And, wow, do readers love to feel feelings along with the characters!
Instead, by using the language of the body, the writer can show how angry the character is, and bring the reader along for the ride:
I leaned toward him, narrowing my eyes, and stabbed my finger into his chest. “Don’t you dare tell me I don’t care!”
This time, the character didn’t need to name their emotion. We got it through body language of narrowing the eyes, stabbing the finger, and I’m pretty sure the recipient of the finger poke did too. It’s also far more interesting to read than simply hearing one character telling the other that they’re mad.
So, this is the first and most important tip I can give writers — if you catch your character naming their emotions, whether verbally or internally, ask yourself if there’s a better way to show the emotion through body language.
Showing Conflicting Emotions Through Body Language
Sometimes body language can be used purposefully by a character to come across a certain way that’s contradictory to what they’re really feeling. For example, someone very nervous, who doesn’t want to appear nervous, might relax back in their seat, loosely crossing their legs in a casual manner. However, the telltale, unconscious biting of their nails might give them away.
This leads to another thing to think about: body language also has to be considered from the viewpoint of the observing character. What one character might believe is just a comfortable position with their arms crossed, might be perceived by another character as being defensive.
For example, a teenager, who knows that rolling his eyes will infuriate his mother, might do so in jest, and if Mom’s the viewpoint character, she’s going to interpret it as disrespect, even though the kid thought he was being funny (ask me how I know this). So, the perception of the interacting characters is another really important consideration in determining how to use body language in your book.
Who the viewpoint character is and the filter through which they process the world is also key. In the example above with the nervous character, let’s say she’s interviewing for her dream job, and she feels like her whole future is riding on it. If we’re currently in her point of view, she would try to look as relaxed and confident as she can, but she might not notice that she’s biting her nails until the interviewer looks pointedly at her hand in her mouth. At which time, she’s likely to realize what she’s doing, yank her finger out of her mouth, and try to appear more relaxed.
If the interviewer is the viewpoint character, maybe a man who’s been secretly in love with her for years, he might think it’s adorable that she’s nervous and biting her nails. But if the interviewer is a woman who feels threatened by this younger, more qualified job applicant, she might view the nail biting with disdain (and produce a sneer that signifies that disdain…her own body language).
This might be a long around way to say the important bit: Be sure you know whose viewpoint the scene is in and how that POV character would interpret body language, either their own or that of another character.
Cultural Aspects of Body Language
Another way viewpoint and interpretation of body language can be especially important is if your book is set outside of North America or other “Western cultures.” Cultural interpretations of body language should be noted, because if your character gets something wrong, there may be consequences!
For example, in Western culture, strong handshakes are considered confident. However, in Turkey, that strong handshake may be considered aggressive. If an American character is in Turkey and shakes in a way they believe will express their self-assurance, their new Turkish friend may be shocked at their rudeness. A businessperson traveling overseas might research cultural differences, to make sure they don’t make any faux pas, but someone just headed over for a vacation might not.
Observing body language incorrectly in a different culture can serve its purpose, too, if that negative reaction is what you’re going for.
Choosing Body Language Verbs Intentionally
The importance of choosing your words intentionally (particularly verbs) cannot be overstated. But this is particularly important in writing about body language, where these words lead to how a reader visualizes what’s happening.
One body language gesture I find often written incorrectly is “nodding” vs. “shaking” of the head. Nodding is the up-and-down motion of the head, which indicates “yes” or agreement. Shaking of the head, is the side-to-side motion of the head, and means “no” or disagreement. I’ve run a cross instances of a character “shaking their head yes,” which is a contradiction. (Also, if it applies, you may need to look this up in terms of other cultures, where this may be different.)
Same with smiling. It’s less open to interpretation than the eyebrow raise, or the classic arm-crossing…or is it? I’ve worked on novels where characters “smiled” and “smiled” and “smiled” and “smiled.” Every single time they spoke, they smiled. And then another character would smile back, and so on.
But there are all kinds of smiles, and they aren’t all created equal. Smiles can be forced, fake, or uncomfortable. They can convey sarcasm or seduction. Thoughtful or dreamy smiles might occur when a character is contemplating a happy memory. There are sad smiles and flirty smiles. Characters can grin, beam, smirk, or simper.
After seeing that (admittedly incomplete) list of smile possibilities, can you see that you need to be specific sometimes, in order to get across the proper emotion of your character?
Here’s an example:
“We have to work this weekend. I guess we’ll just have to make the best of it,” he said, grinning.
She smirked. “You might make the best of it, but I’m going to do something about it!”
In the first line, if you’d just said the character “smiling,” the reader wouldn’t have known what he really thought. By using the word “grinning” instead, we know that this character isn’t all that broken up about having to work the weekend. The returning smirk (in place of a genuine smile) tells us that our second character doesn’t have the same feelings about it.
So, really consider the words used to describe your body language and whether they get across the emotion you’re going for. Don’t leave it to the reader to figure it out.
Body Language Danger Zone
Warning: Be careful that the use of body language doesn’t start to feel forced, or worse, lazy. It’s not just about using a lot of different verbs to describe body language (which has its own issues); it’s about choosing the right verbs.
For example, trying to be fancy and using any word except for “laugh” or “smile” can come off as forced and difficult to read. Don’t go nuts with the thesaurus trying never to use the word “smile.” Sometimes a simple “smile” is just fine. But if there’s a different feeling behind it than friendliness or happiness, see if there’s a better option.
Make sure that your characters don’t all have the same body language. If one of them cracks their knuckles when they’re nervous, they should be the only one doing that. I worked on a book once where characters were cocking their heads constantly. All of them! It often felt more like a comedy sketch than a novel.
Also, watch that your use of body language verbiage doesn’t become repetitive. Writers tend to have “go-to” words or phrases they use frequently. This can work the same with body language. I’ve read books where characters were constantly “staring” at each other (speaking of aggressive moves!) or wringing their hands or swallowing. In others, the writer had the characters “grab” things (or other people) all the time, rather than using more specific verbs to indicate how someone picked something up or their emotions at the time they reached for a person.
While it’s true that sometimes people have a signature body move, like pushing up their glasses or brushing their hair behind their ears, be sure it doesn’t go overboard in your book. The use of a specific word or gesture too many times can come across as repetitive or start to stand out, jerking the reader out of the story every time they read it.
For example, if you have a character who is anxious, and their nervousness comes across as licking their lips, be judicious about how often you use it. They might do it once or twice throughout a long conversation with someone, but they shouldn’t be doing it every time they speak. Once we know they’re nervous, unless something changes, there’s not generally a reason to continue to show that.
Body Language Nuances
Also remember, people don’t always know they are forming opinions about someone else’s feelings based on body language. While they may determine that the other person doesn’t like them, for example, they might not consciously know it’s because of the person’s crossed arms and slightly furrowed brow.
This is all to say, be careful not to turn your characters into amateur body language specialists, unless, of course, they really are. They might notice and interpret, but not realize that they are interpreting based on what they noticed.
Consider, too, what you can leave out. If the character says, “Yes,” do you also need them to nod? Watch out for unnecessary movements that don’t really add anything to the story. If you’re not sure if something is necessary, ask yourself if there are other clues nearby. If there are, then decide whether to use the body language or the other clues to convey the emotion you’re going for.
In summary, use body language intentionally to reveal how characters feel and how the point of view character is interpreting the feelings of other characters or forming opinions about them. Instead of naming emotions, look for ways to use body language to clue readers in to those emotions.
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